Top 10 Baroque Works Agents pt. 2 (Numbers)

Having looked at the the female half of Baroque Works special agents it’s time to look at their male partners.  Unlike their feminine counterparts who are named after holidays with no obvious way of knowing who outranks who, the guys have number designations with the lowest numbers outranking the higher.  However, the same rules don’t apply on this list, so let’s see where everyone ends up on the Top Ten.

1. Mr 1:  How fitting the number 1 Baroque Work agent is indeed Mr. 1.  He looks like some kind of wandering martial artist, looking for a worthy opponent, whom he finally finds in Zoro, but he’s actually a famous bounty hunter who’s real name is Daz Bones, the coolest real name of any character in One Piece. If there was any doubt as to why he belongs as number 1 on this list, he has the devil fruit ability to turn any part of his body into a blade, which would be an awesome ability and he uses it well.  He is the first opponent that Zoro actually has to “get stronger” to defeat, and even Mr. 1 admires him for it.

2. Mr. 0:  Better known as the privateer Crocodile, Mr. 0 is the mastermind of Baroque Works, with its entire grand operation, being an elaborate scheme to gain access to information about an ancient weapon.  With the ancient weapon in his arsenal, and the thousands of Baroque Works agents under his control, Crocodile ultimately wants to become the King of the Pirates, as was revealed by Miss Goldenweek.  He seems to have lost his ambitions after being defeated by Luffy, and even refuses the opportunity to escape, choosing rather to go to Impel Down, the worlds worst prison.  His ruthless cunning and formidable devil fruit powers make him pretty cool, but he definitely loses points for the tacky checkered coat he wears.  You can see his true style come out after escaping Impel Down, when he and Daz Bones decide to venture out into the Grand Line, perhaps to encounter the Straw Hats again.

3. Mr. 5:  Though he likes to act tough and look stylish, Mr. 5 is actually quite a poser, who demands respect and fear from others he doesn’t actually earn it.  Although he and his partner were feared by some lower ranking members of Baroque Works, and impressed the Unluckys, Luffy and Zoro didn’t pay any attention to them, except to knock them out for being annoying.  When attacked by Hina he simply ran away and left his partner Miss Valentine behind, only moving in to rescue her later, when Mr. 2 distracted Hina.  His Bomb Bomb devil fruit is pretty interesting, and in particular his revolver that he can load with his own breath that explodes when fired out.  Then again flicking exploding boogers is pretty gross so this guy only ranks as high as he does because of the crappiness of the rest of the agents, and not his own coolness.

4. Mr. 9:  For some reason I feel like I’ve met Mr. 9 before, but I can’t remember where.  He is an acrobatic fighter, doing fancy back flips and swinging a pair of metal baseball bats, which kind of reminds me of the Scout class from Team Fortress 2.  He’s not to smart but he does show heart by defending his partner Miss Wednesday when she’s in trouble.  It’s still great to see him get thrown into the line of fire while trying to restrain Zoro with the cables hidden in his baseball bat.  If anyone makes a Mr. 9 skin for TF2, make sure to include that ability in his custom baseball bat.

5. Mr. 11: We really don’t know much about Mr. 11, except that he got captured by the marines, was tricked by Smoker into helping them, and then killed by some ambitious “Million” agents who hoped for a promotion, if he was out of the way.  He looks like he has potential to be decent, judging by his outfit, but then again, maybe it’s better that we don’t know, and it’s that mystery that allows for him to rank as high on this list as he does.

6. Mr. 3:  Just looking at Mr. 3 should be enough to tell you that he isn’t a cool guy.  He prefers to do things in elaborate and conniving ways, which may work for him at times but not against the Straw Hats, and ended up costing him his position in Baroque Works and nearly his life.  He is capable of using his Wax Wax devil fruit to make huge daggers, large enough to stab into a giants hand, and form an armor around himself to physically fight, but only uses it as a last resort or as an act of cruelty.  If the guy would focus on using his powers for combat (and get a hair cut) he could easily rank higher on this list.

7. Mr. 8:  Better known as Igaram, the captain of Alabastas Royal Guard, we are introduced to him as the Mayor of Whiskey Peak, the first town in the Grand Line, that just happens to love partying with pirates.  Of course once the partying is over the citizens of Whiskey Peak kill the pirates and collect their bountys.  As the mayor of this place Mr. 8 looks the part with his fancy duds and old timey wig, but also carrys around a saxophone for no apparent reason.  His crappy wig and saxophone however serve as disguises to conceal his guns, that reveal themselves and fire when he pulls on his bow tie.  I wonder if his saxophone is meant to be a nod to a different manga character known as the Horn Freak.  Whether he is or not I don’t know, but this guy also gos on cross dress as Vivi on at least two occasions, which may prove his devotion for her but also looks just creepy.

8. Mr. 7:  What can be said about Mr.7?  Not much, because we hardly see him at all.  He’s a proficient sniper who is teamed up with Miss Fathers Day, but despite their combined attacks they failed to accomplish anything, except for making themselves look stupid (which they didn’t need help with).  Due to their failure there was no way that he was going to be promoted but thanks to some fan inquiry Eichiro Oda shared a picture of what Mr. 7 would have looked like if he became Mr. 6.  I can only imagine that he keeps looking dumber with each promotion, but we’ll never know for sure.

9. Mr.4 (and his gun dog Lassoo):  Would you look at this guy? Now pair him together with his gun/dog lasso.  These are some of the crappiest characters I have ever seen.  Ironically when they are paired up together they can actually make a pretty good team.  He is incredibly sloooooow when talking or even reacting to something like Usopps 5 tonne hammer attack, yet he can figure out the extremely precise timing, angle and strength to hit a timed explosive device to hit his intended target with amazing accuracy.  Furthermore, despite his scrawny arms he is able to swing a baseball bat that (genuinely) weighs 4 tonnes.  To make any of that impressive though he needs his baseball bomb shooting bazooka that “ate” a devil fruit and became a dog, who can take orders and toss out bombs.  This ridiculous duo is lucky to be together, because on their own, neither would make it onto the Top 10 as a team they are just crazy enough to beat out the next guy.  Which leads us to…

10. Mr. 2 Bon Kurei:  Once again at the bottom of the list Mr. 2 actually suffers from the fact that I know he could be cooler, but chooses to look and act outrageous.  In fact it seems that after getting his butt kicked by Sanji and then “sacrificing” himself and his crew for the sake of the Strawhats, he somehow managed to escape Hina the Black Cage and shows up to accost Mr. 3 wearing a simple button shirt and black suit, without his feather tiara and suddenly looks like a potentially cool dude. Obviously due to his ability to look like other people and of both genders, he has to be versatile in his styles but when it comes down to just being him, why revert to the ballerina instead of the bouncer?  Even if he can pretend to be someone cool, it won’t help him on this list and so he is once again at the bottom of Baroque Works top 10 agents.

11.  Mr. 13 (special mention):  Although his partner Miss Friday placed higher on the list than Mr. 13 that was basically out of necessity.  I didn’t want to include either of the animal agents in the Top Ten but I just needed a tenth member for the females so she made the list.  Thanks to the miniscule appearance of Mr. 11, I didn’t need to use Mr. 13 in the proper list but I still wanted to give him some attention because he seems like a pretty cool otter.  He’s a great artist, a serious spy and he fights with a pair of bladed clam shells which is impressive enough to deserve a mention.


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